A Shot of Hennessy

Mean girls at work

Rarely does one see such raw bitchiness exhibited so plainly as on the premiere of The Real World: Sydney. The battle lines were drawn: the hot girls vs. the not-so-hot girls, creating a perfectly explosive situation for the show. I’m sure the producers were all high-fiving as it unfolded.

I wasn’t the least bit surprised when the girls immediately pitted themselves against each other - after all, as women, we’ve been taught to function this way all our lives. Be sweet to her face, trash her to your friends, but claim not to be “fake” and beg others to be “real” with you. What does it even mean to be real?

I only feel bad for the guys on the show - they are clueless. When guys have arguments, they punch each other then go for cheesesteaks. Unfortunately, that doesn’t really work for us.

With girls, passive aggression is the name of the game. Just look at Mean Girls. Lindsay Lohan doesn’t confront The Plastics - she manipulates them. It would have been hard to make a movie otherwise, of course - but sadly Lohan’s depiction is not far from the truth.

Penn girls are smart, savvy, and sophisticated - we don’t have to resort to such ridiculous antics as The Real World’s notorious cat-fighters - or do we?

I’ve seen it firsthand, and you probably have too. Last year, I walked into a crowded party with a friend who knew the hostesses. I was surprised when one of them accosted me and asked me to leave - I had no idea who she was.

Later she apologized, claiming that she thought I was someone else, but how can you ever be sure? And I feel bad for the person I was mistaken for - this girl meant business. But I can’t blame her. We all do it, regardless of our GPA or how many Management classes we take.

Maybe The Real World is a true microcosm of human life. After all, some experts assert that “girlfighting” is a natural phenomenon. One even claims it’s re-directed aggression due to our subordination by men.

Why can’t we get it together? We attend one of the most prestigious universities in the world - we take classes that the girls on The Real World couldn’t even pronounce.

Yet we still act the same. We’re logical when it comes to solving calculus problems, but completely irrational during roommate disputes over low-fat granola bars. Think of what we could accomplish if we all just got along - maybe we could even elect a real woman to the presidency. Because, just between you and me, Hillary is such a slut.

A Shot of Hennessy appears every Monday and Wednesday

This entry was posted on Tuesday, September 4th, 2007 at 9:28 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.