Last time, I promised to offer a dynamic replacement for the Quaker as our school’s mascot. I encourage you to keep an open mind as you read my suggestion.
Whether or not you’re familiar with the life of Edward Bulwer-Lytton, you’ve undoubtedly heard the adage coined for his 1839 play Richilieu; Or, the Conspiracy. Quoth the playwright, “The pen is mightier than the sword.”
There’s nothing quite like a well-executed pun. Were our school to capitalize on the opportunity presented by this saying, not only would our name recognition problems be a thing of the past, but our fans would be given plenty to cheer about.
Enough beating around the bush. I’m suggesting that we cast off the Quaker and become the Penn “Is Mightier.”
Think about the publicity that such a move would generate. For a school as prominent as ours to take such a daring step would be national news. Regardless of whether or not people liked the name, the days of being confused for the Nittany Lions would be over.
It’s not like we would be the first in the Ivy League to choose an abstract concept for a mascot — other, lesser institutions have tried it and done fine.
We would gain a psychological advantage in competition. To just say the name would be to acknowledge our superiority. Other teams would shy away from doing so, and as Harry Potter has taught us, to fear the name is to fear the thing itself. Imagine the furor of fans crying out over and over again, “Penn is mightier!”
It’s indisputable — while plenty of schools might claim to be the smartest, the most accomplished, or any number of superlatives, we would have a monopoly on might. Naysayers could say anything they wanted, but the perfect comeback would always be waiting: “Yeah, but Penn is mightier.”
As I said, the move would be unorthodox. But so was the founding of our university. Great gambles often bring great success. In a time where Penn is claiming to be “making history,” it’s time to turn the page on an unpleasant chapter of our past.
Tags: Penn athletics
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October 23rd, 2007 at 11:16 pm
I like it, but there is still the problem of the actual mascot itself though. What kind of suit would you put on the field to represent is mightier?
October 24th, 2007 at 12:14 pm
I…yeah, we had this discussion. No.
October 24th, 2007 at 11:39 pm
In response to B…We could keep the Quaker around in principle, as long as he became mightier. A few months of rigorous training in the weight room should do the trick.
November 4th, 2007 at 8:19 pm
I think that’s a great slogan, but possibly the worst mascot ever. For one, how would you use it in sports stories? “Today, the ‘is mightier’ beat Princeton…?” Come on, Nick. I know you can come up with something better than this. (Or maybe you can’t).