The Spin

Clinton Standard Time

Eric Sukumaran

I would just like to begin by pointing and laughing at those who were reportedly in line at 6:45 a.m. for Clinton tickets (box office opened at ten). I turned up at 9:50 and, though the line was very long, was in possession of my ticket a mere five minutes after the Clintonettes (as I shall call his most hardcore fans).

Security was tight (ish). It was both fascinating and exciting to the see the Secret Service agents doing their duties. I’d never seen any of them before, and I guess my life isn’t that different now I have.

And he was late. Boy was he late. Though not the President any more, Bill Clinton managed to live up to the “Clinton Standard Time” reputation we all know him for.

This time was no exception. A montage ran on the projector screen, followed by a bemused, prolonged silence.

It started around 40 minutes late.

The President himself seemed rather lackluster at first. Though still a tall, imposing figure, especially next to President Barbie (and Provost Ken), he seemed very old, his voice cracking. But I was left wondering at how long it had been since I had heard an American leader state his case with facts and figures and refined argument, instead of soundbites. I yearn for those days again. He was eloquent as ever, and passionate for the cause of equality. To his credit, he did not overly politicize the event — the Kerner Plus 40 symposium — given current affairs.

Also, for the first time ever, President Barbie, who came out on stage as bouncy as ever, seemed extremely intelligent when she spoke. She must have gotten training or something, for I was quite impressed. The year I attended convocation, the eminent political scientist quoted Green Day, so this was a big step up. The Provost, Ron Daniels, managed to screw things up by telling everyone he and the University president had given Clinton “quality merchandise” from Penn, including a golf jacket. Yeah, I bet he’ll be wearing that… never.

P.S. To the Secret Service: Thank you for not strip searching me.

Leave a Reply