In the fall of 2008, I’ll be studying in Paris, France — mostly because of my penchant for silly hats, effeminate men and unlikely combinations of the two.

But I’m a College student, so I’m not part of Penn’s current problem with getting engineering students abroad. Sometimes, that’s the fault of engineering students — who perceive study abroad as “difficult,” uninteresting and inconvenient. Other times, it’s the fault of the program; to study at France’s leading scientific school, for example, engineering students are required to stay a full academic year. (And really, who wants eight whole months of pacifism, gastronomic bliss and encouraged societal polygamy?)

So how do we convince more SEAS students to spend time away from this university? Apparently, Penn’s original strategy — locating itself in West Philadelphia — hasn’t done enough to push future engineers away from campus. But perhaps we can solve the problem with an idea taken from Virginia’s Randolph College: reinstating the collegiate field trip.

Just last week, twelve Randolph students trekked all the way to Las Vegas in the interest of visiting a brothel. They ended up at The Chicken Ranch — or the “best little whorehouse in the West” — and asked the employees some questions about military discounts (yes, they still give them) and reverse Cleveland steamrollers (no, they don’t). Then the students were given $15 for expenditures and told to “meet back here in fifteen minutes.” The majority only needed three and a half.*

The main takeaway from this story is as follows: if Randolph can do it, then so can Penn. Last semester was the first time that Randolph even admitted male students, so the quick conversion from boy-banned to brothel-bound is quite impressive. And the Vegas trip warranted the school free media coverage, paid-for plane tickets and even Chicken Ranch key chains. It’s hard to imagine how brothels could ever be detrimental to society.

So wise up, SEAS, and use the oft-ignored field trip to get students exicted about leaving Philadelphia. And if you can’t quite convince them to spend a semester studying abroad, try to send them at very least to a Nevada brothel — where I’m sure they’ll still find time to study many a broad.

(*Half of this paragraph is true. You can guess which one. Or Google it.)

Tags: brothels, field trips, study abroad

This entry was posted on Monday, April 14th, 2008 at 6:23 pm and is filed under Higher Education, Philadelphia. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.