This Fall Break, instead of holing myself up to prepare for an impending string of midterms or going home to spend quality time with my loving family, I packed my bags and headed (Mid)West.
My destination? A certain school in Nelly’s hometown that just happened to be having its Spring Fling equivalent (”WILD”) the very same weekend I had off.
As a spring season athlete, my Fling generally consists of some combination of double-header, bus ride, practice, and, in sharp contrast to most of the Penn population, stone sobriety.
I did, however, call the Quad home freshman year, and I made a point to take a nice slow walk through the Fling festivities on my way home last year, so I’m going to go ahead and pass some judgments on the similarities and differences between our daytime drinking/concert and theirs.
1. Dining decisions… the irresponsible kind. That’s right, I saw you in the Quad clinging to your fried Oreos with your mouth rimmed in white powder like some kind of starving, crack-addicted vulture… not that I’m judging. Likewise, in St. Louis, my adopted Midwestern school lets you buy an assortment of deep-fried happiness into the wee hours of the morning using, get this, your meal plan.
2. Methods of alcohol procurement. Missouri lacks those pesky Blue Laws that make buying beer, wine and liquor in Pennsylvania an exercise in forethought, planning and multi-stop shopping. Imagine walking into Fro Gro to see the shelves stocked with the contents of Wine & Spirits AND the beer distributor. We call this place “Schnucks.”
3. White people dancing(?) to music produced by black people. And by dancing, I mean swaying awkwardly or bobbing appreciatively or pumping their fists or falling down or just giving up and making out with the person next to them. Any of the above are acceptable concert behaviors in either locale.
Enjoy yourself!
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